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solo uno para ahora

 
Yeah- I know.  This is cheating, using Amber´s pic (and only one at that) but hey.  Poco a poco.  Everyone was ready to leave and I couldn´t find the cord immediately and you know.  Plus, I´m not very good at documenting stuff.  We just came back from debrief at the beach (with Tyler!) and I have no pics of my own to prove it. 
 
At times I wish I had the end result, an awesome pic, but have no desire to take the steps necessary to make it happen. Whipping out a camera can be an inconvenience and draws attention to oneself and I guess since I usually don´t appreciate people shooting me, I find myself assuming that others wouldn´t care for it either.

Letting people capture a moment can be risky.  There´s a few facebook pics that I desperately wish I could convince people to delete, but without getting over the threat of what if I blink and everyone laughs at the weird face, there´s no chance of getting a good one. 
 
With that in mind though, making that moment can be equally scary, if not more so.
 
Like trying to get me into that dress.  Since I´ve gotten a bit bored with the three skirts to my name, for our Valentine´s Day outing, I gathered up the courage to ask to borrow someone else´s but actually letting myself step out into something unfamiliar took a little more convincing.
 
Poco a poco.   It´s scary letting oneself be caught in the unexpected, leaving the girls´room when all of the guys, including a few Nicaraguan friends, are playing with iguanas on the porch.  It´s risky to let someone zoom in and adjust the focus so that every fault is clear.  Every misplaced hair is obvious.  Bruises can show up when people get that close. 
 
Yet without allowing for the chance for something to go wrong, the chance for capturing a moment gone right, whether on film or simply in ones memory, is slim.  Without letting people get close enough to see the imperfections, their ability to see and take part in the good is limited.
 
Then, not only would I have no pictures but no stories either.
 
 
 

3 Comments

  1. Well, you all look beautiful to me! SO sorry we couldn’t make it to your debrief! Hope it was wonderful!

  2. My grandmother keeps hounding me to write down EVERYTHING I do…she’s so worried I’ll forget the special things that have happened in my life. While I don’t always follow that advice, I do see the value in it. You’ll always have the memories, but make sure you save things that remind you to remember! (journals, pictures, souvenirs, etc.). Sorry we missed you at debrief 🙁 Praying for you all!

  3. I think you are gorgeous inside and out…and I guess I have some of the forced facebook photos to prove it!

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